The Frightened Light
by Kirabaros
Summary: Cas has been cured but it just a little thing in the bigger picture and he notices it with his charge and learns about what she learned from Darkness. Tag to The Bad Seed and submitted for #frightmonth on Deviantart.


**The Frightened Light**

 _It was like being on a hunt; the thrill of the chase and seeking out your opponent and using your skills and knowledge to track and take down your prey. It was a thrill to baser instincts but not so much fun when it was being used against you. Of course that is a thrill of a different kind._

 _Angela peered around the crates and took a tentative sniff. She could feel the trembling girl underneath her hand and she patted her on the shoulder to reassure her. She would do what she could since the spell was putting Castiel, her angel, on attack dog mode and she knew that once relived of it he would remember everything._

 _"Please. I just want to go home," the girl whispered tearfully._

 _Angela looked at the girl and said, "It'll be fine." A noise caught her attention. It was loud enough for her to hear but a normal human wouldn't have. "When I say go, you run like hell and don't look back."_

 _Sure enough Castiel found them. He made a beeline towards the girl but Angela got in the way. She grabbed a hold of the angel and shouted for the girl to run. She didn't see if the girl left since attention was on the angel that was looking at her with that attack dog rage. She grunted, "Stop it Cas. Stand down."_

 _She didn't let go and at some point she felt the angel's hands on her throat. He was slowly choking her but she was fighting and it was slowly becoming a battle that was being lost. She still fought though and then Dean came in and somehow wrestled the angel off her. But that didn't slow the angel down until…_

 _"It has been fun little aingeal and I hope we get to enjoy another round without the company of the Winchesters."_

 _Angela felt rage that was almost the same when Sam had died. She wanted to tear Rowena into little bloody pieces. She grabbed the grating and yanked hard. It was enough to make a dent as she growled at the witch._

 _"I definitely will see you next time."_

 _"And I will kill you."_

 _"I'd love to see ya try."_

"It's been a long time since I've seen you use your healer powers."

Angela leaned against the railing of the staircase that led into the bunker. It was one of her favorite places to just observe from. She got a nice view and sometimes she just liked to watch the Winchesters go about their business; it reminded her of when she used to watch from afar. It felt good to remove herself and have things play out without her involvement.

She had come there to think after she took care of Dean's face courtesy of Castiel under and attack dog spell. A lot was still on her mind even though her first priority was taking care of her angel. Now that the spell was gone, she could think and try to figure out what was wrong with her and what the deal was with Darkness. It was inevitable that the angel would find her but she didn't mind. She looked at him and replied, "Just doing what needed to be done and I've used them before."

Castiel peered at his charge as she leaned against the railing and leaned with her. "I haven't," he replied in a gravelly voice. "You've gotten stronger."

"Had to if I was going to cure Sam and those people." Angela looked ahead and tapped the railing with her fingertips before saying, "After Darkness was released, there was an illness that came and turned people into mad killing machines. Black veins lined their blood and you got infected by ingesting an infected's blood. Sam killed a nurse that was infected."

Castiel listened and put the pieces together even though his mind was tired from the spell. He knew that she was baring her soul and it was a rare thing for her. "Sam was dying. You did what you've always done."

"I didn't know what to do except treat symptoms and help him with the others. I wouldn't leave him and not ever. Always and forever… but I don't know everything Cas." She looked at the angel as she clasped her hands together. She took a breath and continued, "The only way I helped was after Sam received a vision of what would work but I was compelled to add my own touch and it worked on him and the people."

"You have become more powerful," Castiel replied after a spell. "You always were a healer at heart. Joshua spoke of it when I was given the assignment of watching over you. That you had a healer's heart that was protected by the hardness of experience."

"An interesting way of putting it." Angela couldn't help but smile at that. "But what good is it if I can't even help you. I couldn't break the spell that bitch Rowena cast and I have no idea what to do about Darkness."

"You were the one that said abilities are like learning to walk. I believe that you said to Hibah."

"And I am surprised you remembered that. I knew you were a softie with her." Angela grinned at the angel and raised her brow slightly.

"We have a bond because of her father," Castiel replied looking like he was affronted that the relationship was anything but that.

Angela knew that and she loved teasing the angel since she made him hold her and he did what he had to do to protect her. "Still that is good advice but I don't know Cas. I don't know how it will work out and Darkness…" She lapsed into silence.

Castiel took in the silence and then said, "Darkness is not a burden for you to bear alone. We are all working on how to fix it."

"Not this," Angela replied as she shook her head slightly. She looked down to see Sam and Dean interacting and she gave a gentle smile at the scene. She missed those moments.

 _You always were one to protect the innocent. It was why He created you… You've crossed the line to dance with me…_

Angela sobered as she recalled her meeting with Darkness. Softly she said, "I met Darkness, Cas. And… and she knew me… but I don't know her." She looked at the angel with a worried expression.

Castiel took in her words and it had him baffled as well. He did know of the battle to imprison Darkness in the Mark of Cain but the details were always elusive. He offered, "It is possible that she heard of you from Cain and then Dean by wearing the mark."

"No Cas. She knew me like I know you." Angela pursed her lips as she flexed her fingers in their clasped position. She adjusted her posture to try and figure out what to say next. Finally she decided to come out and say it, "She gave me a memory. Of me and her fighting a long, long time ago."

Castiel frowned at that. It was alarming mostly because he was sensing her distress and it was high. Yet she was showing a calm demeanor. It was a testament to her inner strength but the angel knew that it wouldn't be what it was today without the Winchesters, especially Sam, by her side. She had survived but now she lived. Yet this was different. "But you know what is yours and what is not."

"True but this was different. I know how to tell the difference between a memory belonging to someone else and my own. This felt like it was my own but I have no memory of it." Angela looked at the angel and added, "I don't know what it means."

Castiel didn't know what it meant either and it perplexed him that she didn't go to Sam about this. Or both Winchesters for that matter. She always did. "I don't know either. Have you spoken to Sam?"

"That I can't do. Not yet."

The silence became a bit unnerving even though they had always enjoyed each other's silent company. Castiel knew something was wrong and it bothered him. "Why?"

"Because… Darkness knows about true souls and since she knows me… knows that I am one." Angela paused a moment before adding, "And that I have my other half. How much she knows… I don't know but I didn't tell her anything."

"And you're afraid of what she might do to Sam."

"Cas, she said she killed my twin in that life she thinks I was a part of. And she made a promise."

"What kind?"

 _I look forward to meeting your twin in his incarnation._

 _Your twin wouldn't let it go the first time. And he won't again. He'll die like last time._

"What kind?" Castiel asked again a little more forcefully. He saw she had slipped into a thoughtful mode or was remembering something.

Angela looked at Castiel and replied, "That she'll kill him. She had done before and would do it again." She paused and looked away to try and put together her thoughts into words. "I know that we have taken care of threats like this before but Cas… this feels different.

"Believe me, If Sam and Dean were threatened I'd take care of it but this… When I first met her, I got this cold shiver and I didn't like it at all. It was cold, calculating I think and just the fact that she has the advantage of knowing me by I don't know jack squat… I'm afraid, Cas."

That much the angel could figure out. The trouble was, he had never seen her like this before and it had him concerned. He didn't know what to do but he realized she had come to him because she wasn't certain how to explain it to the Winchesters. He was hardly qualified for a heart to heart talk but he felt compelled and he wanted to help her out. "I… I don't know what to say."

"Just being someone to listen is a lot," she offered, "And what I needed. I know I need to tell them at some point but… especially Sam."

"At least speak to Sam. It's his life and I know he would do anything for you and with you. You aren't alone."

Angela couldn't help but giggle a little. "You really did pick up a bit hanging around Metatron. That is the one good thing I can say about him." She smiled at the angel. "I'll talk to Sam. I just… needed help making sense and it still doesn't."

"I will do what I can. You are more than a friend."

"Already taken, Cas," Angela joked before giving the angel a hug. "But thanks all the same. I do need to know if it is true… about me and Darkness."

"It is possible it is a trick."

"I know but… I have to be sure especially that weird dream or vision I had before you bolted on me and I chased after you."

Castiel coughed uncomfortably. "That was… it was a spell."

"I know. The timing just seems coincidence and just plain a pain in the ass. What's next? Me getting pregnant?"

Castiel had no answer for that and watched as Angela started down the stairs. He observed as she went to do what she always did and that was to take care of the bunker… like a housewife. As disturbing as that thought was to him, that was the best way of describing it. He watched as she stepped up to Sam and it was like the whole atmosphere changed and noted the way how Sam seemed to light up the moment he saw her. It was a rare and beautiful thing.

She was afraid. That much was clear to the angel as he watched Angela lead Sam off for what they called taking a walk. True she had faced threats against Sam and Dean before but she was scared. And he understood what she where she was coming from. This Darkness knew his charge in a personal manner and he suspected that their encounter was more than what she had described it to be. It had him angry at that.

While it was a possibility that Darkness was putting fear and doubt into his charge by claiming to know her, Castiel couldn't shake the idea that it might be true. It wasn't breaking news, as Sam put it, that Angela's soul had previous incarnations since they discovered one was in ancient Egypt. It was possible to have a memory suppressed to the point that it was like it never existed, but an entire life? That was something he intended to look into and it kept him in thought as he watched the three of them interact below.

* * *

 **A/N:** Cas is cured but he notices something is up with his charge and has a heart to heart. Tag to The Bad Seed. Enjoy!


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